Thursday, February 16, 2006

More suggested '08 Republican convention sites!

Since I posted the list yesterday of possible Republican convention sites, along with my suggestions, I’ve received a few more suggestions from readers over at the Daily Kos that I wish I’d thought of but, well, I didn’t. So here you have a few more possible locations for the 2008 Republican convention:

Tallmansville, WV: What better choice than wild, wonderful West Virginia? It’s a state full of Democrats who voted Republican in the last two presidential elections. Better still, Tallmansville is the site of the now-famous Sago Mine, which collapsed last month due to toothless safety regulations, weakened by a Republican-aligned business community hot for profit-raising deregulation. What better way to celebrate the success of laissez-faire economics? And to commemorate all those miners who died in the name of a slightly higher profit margin?

Guantánamo Bay, Cuba: What a great way to remind everyone about how everyone deserves to be presumed innocent until proven guilty, except for accused terrorists! Plus security will be easy to manage, press will be easy to corral, and protesters will be kept at bay—just not this bay!

Somalia: No government, no services, no taxes, no gun laws: it’s a Republican paradise!

Baghdad, Iraq: We liberated it and now it’s free and peaceful, at last! And why shouldn’t the party that brought us the Iraq War enjoy its fruits?

Northern Marianas Islands: Great, low labor costs, brought to you by Jack Abramoff and Tom DeLay! Slave labor is very cost effective!

Thanks for the suggestions, Kos readers! Keep ‘em coming!


At Friday, February 17, 2006 at 9:00:00 AM EST, Anonymous Anonymous said...

St Petersburg, FL
To spotlight the compassionate side of the Republican party, delegates can participate in a service project. By way of the Patriot Act, they can circumvent HIPA regulations, and locate those with eating disorders. Specifically locate anorexics and force feed them. Leave it to a Republican to mistake responsible eating, as a starving person's last wish. I'm sure if we scan Schindler's List (Schindler-Schiavo Foundation), we would also see Saddam Hussein's name. As an extension of good will, we should send Jeb over to feed him? "Open up big guy, here comes the scud."
Don't forget to stop at the NRA kiosk. Sign up for a hunter safety course. Instructor: VP Dick Cheney.


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